Randomness

The Theories of Being a Writer

I don’t know if its because I’m going stir crazy from not writing that much (I’ve flipped back to being an avid reader lately) or if turning the big 3-0 in exactly two weeks from today has finally sent me mentally over the edge. In all honesty, I’m excited. πŸ™‚ New decade, new experiences, new life changes. And unfortunately, new life reality checks. So far, my theories of being a writerΒ that ruled my 20’s have had some interestingΒ and often unexpected turns. Since I’m coming to an end of an era, I thought I’d share what I’ve learned so far from being an indie author.

THE THEORIES OF BEING A WRITER

(As told through Robert Downey, Jr., Jude Law, and Rachel McAdams’ gifsΒ from theΒ Sherlock Holmes movies)

Theory: “If someone criticizes my work, no big deal. Its just one person.”

Reality:

Oh, you don’t like my story? Bite me.

Theory: “The story has to come naturally for me. I don’t like pushing my story lines or my characters, because often the story will become cliche and the characters will become too predictable.”

Reality:

Me: “So…what do you wanna do?” Character: “I don’t know. What do you wanna do?” Me: “Don’t know. Wanna do anything?” Character: “Not yet.”

Theory: “Writing isΒ easy.”

Reality:

Nope. Writing’s a bitch with sharp weapons.

Theory: “I just sit at a computer or pull out my journal and write what I feel.”

Reality:

I just came from the netherworld. Don’t mind me.

Theory: “I tend to put my characters through things that a normal person probably couldn’t live through.”

Reality:

Image result for jude law sherlock holmes gifs
Guilty.

Theory: “I like to write stories with a little mystery and suspense.”

Reality:

You have no idea.

Theory: “I’m open to suggestions when it comes to my writing. If people think a story should go a certain way or a scene should be altered or changed, then I’m happy to listen to their opinion.”

Reality:

Oh you want me to change all that? Hahahahaha No.

Theory: “Writer’s block sucks, but I try to accept it. Sometimes it can make the story better because it forces me to take a step back and analyze what I’ve done.”

Reality:

But I was in the middle of that…

Theory: “The publishing world has gotten easier with self-publishing. It’s just friendly competition now.”

Reality:

Image result for sherlock holmes boxing gifs
Eat my rough draft, poser!Β Imma write my foot up your ass with my marketing techniques! BAM!

Theory: “I don’t mind killing characters off. It’s just a character. And sometimes it makes the story more interesting and intense.”

Reality:

Damn. I liked that character, too.

Theory: “I know I’ll have to market my books eventually. But it shouldn’t be that hard.”

Reality:

Observer: “You know, you should post ads. How about giveaways? Bookmarks, grab bags, book tours, book signings. You can’t just think about writing now. You have to get yourself out there. You should be trying harder…” Me: PUNCH!

Theory: “I love getting reviews. I love to know what people think of my work.”

Reality:

Oh gawd a review. Is it bad? I can’t read it.

Theory: “I’m a writer. I know how to develop characters, create elaborate scenery, draft catchy plots, and wield fantasy into reality with the stroke of my keyboard and pen.”

Reality:

I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing.

And last but not least…

Theory: “No matter how battered and gritty and bloody and silly and ridiculously weird it all is, at the end of the day its just me and my characters buildingΒ a story that needs to be told.”

Reality:

You’re damn right.

So keep writing, my friends. You never know who may be falling in love with your stories.

Advertisements

13 thoughts on “The Theories of Being a Writer

  1. The Big 3-0 isn’t all that bad (If I can remember back that far), Wait until you hit the big 6-0. Actually, I’m going to hit the big 6-9 on June 24 and I’m all that happy about it. Oh well, age is just a number; tell that to my body, LOL Today’s our 38th wedding anniversary, too. When’s your B-Day? If it’s any consolation, I’ve been having a hard time writing too, and I’m not sure why, Probably just good old procrastination and A.D.D. Maybe we need a mid-summer NANOWRIMO challenge. Anyway, enjoy being young while you can, but remember your fans are (not so) patiently waiting for “Under a Melting Sun,” and I ain’t getting any younger. Happy 30th.

    1. Aw that’s so awesome!! Happy early birthday, just in case I miss getting online to tell you on the official day. πŸ˜‰ My birthday is officially tomorrow, and I’m trying to remain excited about it. It feels like I’m losing a part of my childhood all over again, except this time it’s the “young adult” version. I’m blaming that on why I’ve been having a hard time writing lately. I failed the Camp NaNoWriMo in April, but we should totally do the July one. πŸ˜€ Mainly so I can get this book off the ground for my favorite readers. πŸ˜‰

      1. I love those words of wisdom. πŸ˜€ And I’m already failing at July Camp NaNoWriMo lol! How are you doing? I may just have to gear up for the big November run. If I can pull this latest story together, I may be free to write a certain sequel during the real NaNoWriMo. πŸ˜€ Fingers crossed!

  2. Absolutely loved this πŸ™‚

    And… ok, I’m not saying that, because wishes before birthday aren’t luck. But on that day, remember I’ll think of you.

    Well, my ’30 sucked. I was so happy when I turned 40, really. But I’m sure your 30 will be fabulous!

    1. Aw thank you so much!! πŸ˜€ And although your 30s sucked, at least 40 was amazing, which gives me more hope when I start getting closer to that age. πŸ™‚ Hope all is well!

  3. I loved this piece (A). You are a fabulous writer! Always remember your writing will be there when you are ready. Ps: I’m hanging out for book 2 of the Benighted πŸ™‚

    1. Thank you so much!! ❀ And yes, so am I. It's going to be a monster to write, but sooo worth it. πŸ˜€ Can't wait for your books to be out! I'm dying to read more about Christopher. ❀

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s